Meltdown

Well, I think I had my first official meltdown of my adult life last night. Wasn't terrible, but I'm pretty sure it qualified as a meltdown nonetheless. I didn't workout (due to the cold), but had a giant cookie after lunch and then another small cookie later in the day. Then my boyfriend wanted to go to dinner at this pizza place...I didn't want to go, but I knew that would be my only chance to see him this week since we are both busy the rest of the week. I ordered a salad, but then decided spinach dip was in order, ate all of that, and then felt like ass. Mostly because I haven't worked out, am bored at work (not currently on a project = no important work to do), and am in general bored in life (not much going on these days). Then my boyfriend had told his house mates he would hang out with them last night, so after dinner we parted ways. I actually stopped at the liquor store on the way home and bought an Its It (for anyone who doesn't know, it's like an ice cream sandwich with cookies and dipped in chocolate. yeah.) It was like I was thinking to myself, Michelle you are melting down. This will all be over tomorrow. But for now, have the Its It. I could hear the voice in my head saying that food won't make you happy, but I ignored it. I felt like an alocholic buying a bottle of Jack. It was actually pretty comical. I slapped the Its It down and said, "That's it." It was like a diet/life simultaneous melt down. But I am over it now. Feeling much better, but still mad at my boyfriend since he never called last night to make sure I was ok. I guess he didn't take my threat of eating an Its It on my own seriously. Ok, today I'm back to eating right, going to some form of exercise as my cold is getting better, and going to dinner tonight with friends who I haven't seen in a long time. I'm going to have a glass of wine and a few samples of the dishes (its a small plates restaurant), but I'm going to stick to the dishes that I order and not sample any of the fried things that other people get. Oh, and it's our admin's birthday today and she brought in donuts. You know what I said to the donuts? Fuck you, donuts. Sorry for the language ;o)