my name is michelle, and i'm a binge eater

i thought i had my problem taken care of...so many years later. but my binge eating had reared its ugle head again, and i have no one but myself to blame. the past couple of months i have stuffed anything and everything in my mouth. it started with the "drunchies" (see below posts), but has translated into every aspect of my life. i crave to be back on my regular schedule, to eat healthy and in moderation, to not spend every minute of every day thinking about food. how does one accomplish this??? i know what has triggered it..the season brings lots of chocolate and cookies, the weather brings lots of sitting inside, the work i'm doing means traveling and eating out a lot...
but none of these things seemed to get me before. i could pass up candy at work like it ain't not thang. but now, i find myself eating five lindor truffles and feeling sick to my stomach a la michelle 2001. my most vivid memory of freshman year is eating a pack of oreos and drinking a coke while studying, then taking a nap because my stomach hurt so bad. gross, right? but somehow, i got back there. this is what i want -- to eat 5-6 sensible meals every day, to enjoy those meals, to let those meal fuel me but not stuff me, and to not think about food during any time but that time. not in the afternoon when work slows down, not when i walk by the cafeteria, not when i'm watching tv. i long for food to stop haunting me and just become food, the way it is to everyone else. the way it was to me before i started dieting....but before i was obese. sigh, that feels good to get out. i have to say, the blog is the best way to purge :P